Talking Fast And Slow – The Easy Framework For Better Communication

TRANSCRIPT AUTOMATICALLY GENERATED Hey, Hey, so we're in that final home stretch of the year, and it's the time of year where things get really, really peopley. And really, really stressy and kind of puts us on. A bit of a collision course with conflict in some way. So today I want to have a chat to you about communication styles. This is going to help you. When you think about at work, how you're talking to your team, how you talk to your clients. But it's also going to help you in this season at home. And what I love about the season is you can take some of this and you can apply it and you can practice it, and then you can bring it back into your business. I like to really simplify communication styles to make it really easy for you to remember. So I work off the disc quadrants. And you don't need to know what any of the disc profiles are. You don't need to know any of that. We can keep it really simple. There are really two criteria that I want you to look for. In how someone is communicating with you. People either really false talkers or they're a bit slower and we'll consider it. This is really easy for you to identify in yourself. The easiest way to think about it is do you find yourself having to repeat yourself fairly often? You're probably more in the Fosse talking space. If you find yourself in the slower side, you might find some people are finishing your sentences. For you, it's just probably really irritating for you. And then you can start to look at conversations. That you're having with other people. And are they talking as fast as you, or are they slower and more considered? Like you. So the first piece we're looking for is that pace. And I'm going to come back to that. The second thing I want you to look at is when somebody is talking about. Uh, let's say a situation or a challenge or something that needs to get done. Are they talking about it in terms of the tasks and the activities? Or are they talking in terms of who needs to be involved or who is going to be impacted? So people will either have more of a task orientation or more of a people orientation. And again, you can think through a situation for yourself thinking about something that you've got coming up an event, or like a social occasion. What are you thinking through? Are you thinking through. Okay. I need to figure out what to wear. I need to like, what time do I need to leave? How am I going to get there? Or are you thinking like, oh, I wonder who's invited or I must remember to tell so-and-so to come along. So, what you're going to have is somebody who naturally talks fast and is more task orientated. You're going to have somebody who naturally talks fast and is more people orientated. And then you're going to have the flip somebody who is slower and more considered, but task orientated, somebody who's slower and more considered, but more people orientated. And the reason we're looking at us is that when you know better, you can do better. So when you're having a conversation with someone. First of all, it can be really jarring when their communication style is in conflict with yours. So, like I mentioned earlier, if you're slower and more considered often, if you're talking to a fast paced person, they're like finishing your sentences or they're interrupting you. Or they're going a million miles a minute with what they're trying to tell you. And just expecting you to keep up. On the flip side, when you're a fast talker, you're probably listening to podcasts at two X. Maybe more because your brain just wants the information as quickly as possible. When those two communication styles meet, it's a natural opportunity for conflict. And I always say that if you're the person who needs the other person to do something, or if you're the person who's trying to diffuse a situation, You want to try and match? The communication style as best you can. what that might mean. If you're a fast talker. Is that you take more pauses? So you say something gives people an opportunity to absorb it. If you're a slower, more considered talker, you think about what it is that you want to say before you start to say it, because then you'll have the full thing out of your mouth before anyone can interrupt you. And the same for task and people. This one, I find doesn't cause as much conflict as the pace seems to cause. But again, if you are talking to someone and you want them to do something, if someone's more task orientated, you might want to think more in terms of to-do list. If somebody is more people orientated, you might want to talk more about the mood of the event and how exciting it's going to be and how much fun it's going to be and how lovely it will be to have all of those connections. How you sell something to someone with an opposite communication style is by adapting your style and when I say sell something that works in business. So when you're selling to somebody, when you are trying to, motivate your team into a particular activity, When you are trying to get your kid to do something when you were trying to not have world war three at the dinner table with extended family. I find very often that even just explaining this fast, slow people task. Orientations in our communication styles. Really opens people's eyes in their relationships. Normally, as I'm talking, people are identifying like, oh, I'm definitely this quadrant. I'm like fast and task. And oh my gosh, My partner is totally like slow and people. No wonder we clash when we try to discuss going on vacation. Or whatever. No communication style is better or worse or more qualified in any situation. It's about being able to meet people where they're at, whether that's in your business or at home in order to really foster that relationship. Rather than accidentally creating conflict.