Building Sustainable Success With Samantha Hearne

Diane: Hey, Hey, this week's guest is Samantha Hern, a business coach and mentor who helps her clients build an engaged community and sell out their programs. Using social media. She is known for her high energy and consistency on social. So hopefully she's going to spill all of those sustainable success secrets with me. Hey Sam, welcome to the show. Sam: Hello. Thank you for having me. Diane: I'm so excited to dive into this, but before we start, let's talk a little bit about your lifestyle business and how it's evolved . Sam: Yeah, for sure. It definitely has grown over time. So I was a teacher and I used to work in a secondary school. I was head of sick form. And I worked in one of the top schools in the UK. So it was really, really high pressured. Obviously I had a lot of responsibility I loved being a teacher and I loved my job and I loved my school. I loved everything about it, but I got to a point where I'd gone straight in from uni and I worked in one school and I got a promotion and moved to this school. And I knew very quickly that if I was going to move schools, I would only be moving to a school less than mine. So I started to think, you know, Is this sustainable really? I would do six til six every day. Obviously the results at my school were incredible. And a lot of that fell on me obviously in charge of year 13. And I just, I kind of thought to myself, I don't know if I could do this at this level forever. So I kind of. Accidentally ended up going into business, to be honest. Back then the thing that I knew most about was anxiety because it was such a big part of my life. So my first business I set up, I started an Instagram account. I literally started an Instagram account in 2017, and it's focused on mindset, positivity, anxiety, and I, became an anxiety coach. I wrote my own book. Right for magazines. And then within a year, the business had done so well that I was able to leave. My amazing job. And people started to ask me how I'd done that. So I started to transition into supporting other ambitious people online who wanted to create their business, but maybe it wasn't just in anxiety or mindset and teach them what I done. Building a community. Creating content attracting your ideal clients, all of these things. And then, yeah, two years later, fast forward. I now focus really heavily on business coaching and mentoring, and a lot of my programs now, which I love have a bit of a twist around education school, you know, being a teacher. So my journey has very much. And I know for some people it's, it's almost frustrating when they hear this, because you just want the method, you know, you want that like 10 steps to getting to where you've got to. But for me it really was, I just followed the momentum. I followed the momentum of meeting new people and networking saying yes to things before I was ready. Listening to my audience and it just became what it is now, really? So yeah. Now obviously I coach people in line and create successful businesses and run my own successful business. But, you know, three years ago I was just a girl that started an Instagram account and would post pictures, tend to people to make sure they're happy. You know, so yeah. That's, that's a bit about how I've got here. Yeah. Diane: and I feel like we've kind of known each other almost. First, online, and then in person, since the beginning of your journey and the one thing that is consistent with you throughout, no matter which business it was, is your consistency. I don't think I know anybody who shows up. As much as you do. And I don't think there's a morning where I go on Instagram. We're both in the UK and there's already a story from you that's from today. And I'm curious as to how you. Created that much momentum. And then how you sustain it? Has there ever been a moment where you were like, okay, I need a month of social or I don't know what to talk about today. Sam: That's a good question. I think, yeah, this comes up a lot. Definitely. Consistency is something that I, I do pride myself on being consistent and it is something I am very visible, but I was talking to a client about this today, actually social media. Is an illusion and social media is very, very good at accelerating time as well. You know, we see a snapshot into someone's journey and experience and when I was teaching, so I was a PE teacher and my uniform, my PE kit at the time, it was all black, which is very, very different to my brand, which is yellow, bright, you know? And so Monday to Thursday, when I was, you know, pulling 12 hour days and I was wearing all black, I didn't ever show up, live on my stories, but my face was always on my stories. So it was like screenshots photos, text, and then Friday to Sunday was the time that I then show up, I'd wash my hair, all of those things. And I think that taught me very early on. No one ever noticed no one ever notice that Monday to Thursday, I didn't actually physically speak on my stories live and it now, yes, I definitely do speak a lot more, but there are days that I don't show up, but I do show up if that makes sense, you know, so it would be screenshots photos you know, climb wins. But the reason I do it. So to answer your question, you know, w how can I sustain that? I always think to myself, and this is what I would encourage anyone that uses social media to try and really do because social media can become a trap and it can be a place that we almost come to for validation and, you know, external feedback and, and, and that can be really beneficial, but it can also be really dangerous. You know, if we do show up when we're feeling a bit more vulnerable and fragile, To get this external validation and maybe we don't get it. Social media can become a really, really harmful place. So the thing that I've been able to do, which allows me to sustain my momentum, I always think to myself, if I was someone watching my story, how would I make them feel? And. The reason I say that as well as I will never show up on my stories in the middle of a struggle until I've come out the other side with a solution, because I'm so aware that on social media, right. It's true. Yeah. A lot of people think, you know, you superhuman, you know, Oh my God, you're online all the time. But I think I always share both sides, but I'll never share before I've got a solution because I wouldn't want anyone to feel that I've left them in this kind of. Oh my God. I feel that way too, but there's no, there's no way out. So that allows me to sustain my momentum because I always think I want to be, I want someone to feel good today, you know, whether it's making them laugh or celebrating something or helping someone and the other thing, which is a bit more strategic, I suppose I've made it a non-negotiable for me. The community and building my brand is, is a non-negotiable. And I would say being able to pride myself on the consistency and visibility in community is something it's almost, I don't even think about it now. You know, I'll always show up at some point out my other top tips or I find one is now with my non-negotiable. I will dedicate five minutes a day to do my stories. I'm in that five minutes, I could record say 15 stories, which is three minutes and then I'll leave it. And then throughout the day, if things happen or I'm walking my dog or I'm boomeranging because I'm cold or what have you, I'm going to the gym. I'll add that in and pepper in that stuff. But I just have that non-negotiable that every day I want to be able to deliver some sort of value. I just think it keeps it, I enjoy it as well. Actually. I enjoy it. So I don't really know if that's answered your question and if I have just gone off tangent there. Diane: So what I took away from it is that is not necessarily how you started. So it is a muscle that people can work and improve. And I have a question about that, but I'm going to come back to it. Right? I think the thing that was the most interesting for me is the, you have a five minutes rule and. When I think when you see someone like you on Instagram, it feels like I have seen you on Instagram throughout your entire day. And when you're looking at that, you're like, well, wow. My day was just not that interesting. Like it, wasn't a moment where I thought, Oh, let me take a story of this. Cause I'm doing something interesting. However, if I spent five minutes at the beginning of my day and thought about it, that. It's such a good strategy to be prolific, but without that prolific energy, Sam: For sure. And you know, what's really interesting about that. Definitely I'll, I'll I'll do that, but this is why it's an illusion. I never on my stories share what I'm eating. When I go to restaurants, if I'm out shopping, you never, ever, ever see anybody in my real life, apart from my husband. So if I'm out socializing with my friends, that never goes on my social media. If I'm with my family, that's never on my social media when I'm watching TV. So even though people think they've been part of my whole day, That's the illusion. And, you know, you scroll through these 15 stories and it feels like you've been there all day, but there are so many parts of my daily life, but then just don't make it online. And if I didn't, if I didn't dedicate this five minutes to say, okay, today, I'm going to talk about business strategy. Three sets of stories. It's three minutes and then I can get on with my day. I can coach my clients. I can walk my dog. I can pick up dog poop. I can make my lunch. I can get an Uber eats all this stuff. I can watch Netflix. None of that goes on my social media. So it definitely is really, it's really good that you said that actually, because it is, I'm able to be prolific, but people don't see my entire day or my entire life. And I'm very deliberate about that. But people always feel that I'm active every day. Diane: And I think that's also something for people to consider, even just from a safety perspective, especially women people in this day and age will. Track where you are. You don't know what you're going to say, that's going to set someone off. And so having some part of your life that is a hundred percent, yours is both mentally protective and physically protective. Sam: for sure. I never ever tag like my GM or stuff like that because I, like, I tell people I'm going to the gym, you know, if I happen to have something interesting to say, but also I'm just a normal person, you know? And there's so much. I don't talk about, but I think being on social media, the other thing that I do is I always try and provide value rather than showing up for the sake of showing up. So therefore people watch my stories more because usually they know they're going to gain something. Whereas if I was to suddenly just start sharing, you know, when I get out of bed every day or what I'm having for breakfast, people probably would stop watching. Diane: Yeah, for sure. So if somebody is listening and they're like, okay, I get where you're coming from, this consistency sounds great, but maybe throwing it back to maybe your anxiety days. How do they get comfortable being that prolific with people, engaging with them as if they kind of are a part of your life? Sam: Yeah, great question. I have a quiet at the moment, actually in similar situations, she doesn't really want to get visible. She just doesn't like the sound of her own voice. I was like, let's just start small. I mean, again, we have to remember. It's just an illusion, you know, like obviously social media is real, but it's very different to when you're in real life doing things. And we so easily forget that. So I would say my biggest piece of advice is take it slow and be steady because the last thing we want to do is force yourself into doing some videos and then it puts you off for a month and you disappear again. So I would start with doing things like selfies. With a funny filter or boomerangs or screenshots or images from when you were on holiday or whatever, and just type over them so people could see your face and they can see a bit of your personality. If you do have a funny filter or you do a boomerang. And then the other thing I would say is do a few voiceover stories. So for example, if you have something that you could show someone, put your phone on the thing you want to show them and just speak over so people can hear your voice, but they don't need to see you. Start with just people seeing your face and hearing your voice, but you don't necessarily have to put them together yet. Just get used to putting yourself out there in a way that you can maintain and doesn't make you feel too far out of your comfort zone, because if you do too much too soon, you will end up self-sabotaging, you know, this is too much, it's too difficult and just hide. So that would be my practical tip for that. Diane: how does this spill over into the rest of your business? Because you're not just prolific on social. You are the person who is always having a new program. I have a new podcast. I have a new YouTube. I have, I mean, if there's a definition of all the things, I feel like that's where your face would live. That'd be the photo in the dictionary . Has that been a natural progression? Do you apply the same logic? Have you just dived in? Tell me how that's happened. Sam: I get asked that question a lot and it makes me laugh purely because. I've just always been that way. It's so hard to explain, I'm a Gemini and I have quite an addictive personality. You know, I'm, I'm an extrovert. I do have introverted tendencies, but I am an extrovert in my nature, but I do have an addictive personality. If I like a song, I want to play it 10 times a day. If I, if I have something I like in my sandwich, I'll eat that sandwich. There was a point I ate the same sandwich for eight years. I don't like change. I like what I like, but if I find something I like, I love it. And my personality is very all or nothing. And even when I started teaching, whenever I had to have like a review meeting, you know, you have performance managers meetings. My line manager would always say, you're going to burn out. If you carry on at this pace, you will burn out. And I can honestly say that just hasn't ever happened to me. I can totally empathize with people. I know that I'm an anomaly, you know, like my husband calls me an AVN. it's just in my nature to be quite fast paced. My brain has ideas all the time. So it's really hard to answer that question with. Some kind of like formula. But the one thing that I always tell people is like a top tip. If you don't run at this capacity and you aren't naturally fast paced, I'm very in my masculine energy and I've learned to own that. Now there was a point that I felt bad for that, but I am very, very much, I'm very action driven. I like results. That's just how I am. It's not my personality, but. For someone that doesn't function this way, but does still want to have an amazing business. And they know that this is something that they want to improve on. The one thing I would say is have an ideas book. Have have a notebook, but writing things down is so important for me. And I use my notes on my phone. It doesn't have to be physical book, but have somewhere where you just write everything down, whether it's your to-do list, a question, a word, a phrase, and you will find that that in itself starts to organically prompt ideas and creative juice. Diane: What's happening behind the scenes? Like where is the sustainability coming with the sand that we don't see? Is it the bubble box? Is it the gym? What's the sustainability plan out of hours or off the record? Sam: Such a good question. So the other thing is, this is good. I don't really talk about this stuff, but the other thing is I'm very good at compartmentalizing. So. Even when I was teaching or when I have a coaching call or when I'm in work mode, as soon as I go downstairs, I can watch Netflix and my brain just switches off. it just happens. You know? So before this, I was downstairs watching Virgin river on Netflix, but I had full coaching calls this morning, like back to back, and then I went and walked my dog and I just watched TV. A few things. I do. Number one, I have a bath every day. Even in the summer, like that is a real non-negotiable for me. it just makes me feel safe. I feel warm. It's just, yeah. So it's a, it's a real physical relaxer for me rather than mental. So I have a bath every day going to the gym is actually really new for me. Ironically, I used to be a PE teacher and my degree was in sport, but I never really liked exercise because, I'm very all or nothing. And I'm very competitive. I didn't enjoy exercise because it, it became something that I would go all out. You know, I ran a tank once and I ended up running marathons and then I just gave up, you know, so I just, I can go too far, but this is the first time since March I've exercised for 40 minutes every day. That's my commitment to myself. So 45 minutes a day. So boss exercise and I always make sure I take my dog for a walk, even if it's just around the block, but that's a non-negotiable. And my other non-negotiable, I will always have dinner at my dinner table. I think that's really important. I grew up having dinner at my dinner table. But the other thing that's so important, Diane is I will have periods of time where. I sit and just binge watch TV, I can switch it on if I need to, I can go. And I think that comes from teaching. It's like a performance, you know, you have to stand in front of the kids. And so I owe a lot to teach him really. I talk about it all the time. You know, when I have interviews like this, but the other side of me is very much, I am. Just, I let my brain go dead and watch TV. I just, yeah, I definitely have another side of me that is lazy and in the nicest possible way, but doesn't do anything which is TV puts the blanket on, you know, I just think there's so much beauty and balance, but I think for me, the non-negotiable is I will always give my best to my business. That's a real non-negotiable for me. If I say I'm going to do something, I'll do it. I don't ever make excuses or procrastinate. I think it's just, I don't know if that's just really good self-discipline but a non-negotiable for me is I will always give my best to my business. I'm super serious about that, but if I get everything done and I decide that I want to just go and sit and do nothing, I'll do that. Diane: I wonder if some of that strength of light that, that willpower to push through, even when it feels a bit crunchy, comes from the anxiety and having. Mosque that like learning that as a coping strategy for anxiety Sam: w I R a lot to my upbringing, it was really, really hard. I lived with my dad. I didn't, it was my mom. Like they separated when I was young and my dad passed away when I was 14. Unexpectedly went in for keyhole surgery. He spent three weeks in hospital and he didn't come home. My mum moved to Jamaica when I was 20 and I was at university and I was all in my own. My twin brother then moved to Scotland to be with his now wife. So yeah, I think by 21, it was all on me. I had to be strong. That was my only option I had to finish my degree. I had to get a job. I had to pay rent. So I think I owe a lot of my tenacity to my upbringing for sure, and I think that's why now. A lot of my thinking is there is no other option, even though there is an option now, you know, like I have a lovely house and I'm so lucky I've got a supportive partner and you know, I've got a great business, but my mind always goes to, there is no other choice. There's no other way. And I think, yeah, that definitely comes from being so young and I had to work it out. I had to. So definitely I would say that has a lot to do with it. Diane: It's probably for you, you had to learn the relaxation and the rest and the recovery where other people have to learn the tenacity and the, Hey, this is just a non-negotiable. I have to do this. It's just a different non-negotiable. Sam: Spot on, spot on. That is exactly it. Even now I struggle, you know, because it's just I think, and I think that's why I'm so in my masculine, because it's a form of control, if I can do this, it's on me, I can take control. And, I've done so much over the years, I've had counseling therapy, you know, I've done so much for my mindset and I'm very aware of. The traits that I have and why I have them, but I think I've just so much more loving of them now. And definitely this element of me wanting to be in control allows me to succeed. And I've learned that the things I tried to control that hindered me like relationships and friendships, I can surrender to that, but when it comes to things, that business results outcomes, I'm very driven by that because. It's almost, it shows that I'm worthy, you know, and that we're not younger. Isn't something that I had. So definitely learning to relax and surrender is something that even now I have to work harder at that than I do at being resilient. For sure. Diane: So any other middle sustainability success things that we should be looking at in our business? Sam: Totally. I always say follow the momentum. And what's really important is you can do, everyone tells you to do, but if there's no momentum there, it might not be right for your business. You have, we have to follow the momentum. So if I had five people ask me if I did, I can't even think of an example. I dunno, an online. Resilience course let's say that would probably make me think why. Well, there's something in this it's got legs. So give yourself enough flexibility to follow the momentum. I think the biggest reason that entrepreneurs don't create sustainable success is because we try and. For success in the way that we think it should look like, no, I'm going to launch this and this is what I want to do. But if we've already heard from 10 other people that they want that, but we're trying to create this. We're not going to make it harder for ourselves. So the first thing would be follow the momentum, give yourself the chance to follow the momentum. The second thing I would say is, and this is what for me. We have to go slow and steady, which sounds like a bit of a oxymoron, a bit of a contradiction for me, but although I'm really fast paced and like, go, go, go, my goals are slow and steady. So if I said, you know, I want to earn a million. Let's just say I would not be coming out of the gate in January, 2021, launching a product for 30,000 and being like, let's do this. I would throughout the year. Think of slow and steady ways that I can increase my business income. And I think that's another trap we fall into making money fast or making big launches happen too quickly. This year I've had launches that have stayed the same. But it's slow and steady. The goal is not always to outdo yourself and outperform. So number one, follow the momentum. Number two seven steady, and number three, do not build your business to someone else's drum. If you're trying to say, and someone said this to me yesterday, everyone keeps telling me that I should do a course. I don't really want to do one. If you're not. Taking risks in a way that worked for you. You're not going to create sustainable income because you're not doing it following your own path. And you'll always find yourself needing to look to someone else before you can take action. So that slows you down. And the final thing I would say is. Make mistakes all the time. If you stop making mistakes, you're going to stop growing and then you'll stop succeeding things this year. I've, I've done some stuff. That's been a disaster, but I've done it anyway. And I'm proud of that because it shows I'm always moving forward. And the time that we fear. Making a mistake is the time that we stopped growing so sustainable. And also, sorry. Number five. Sustainability is not sexy when you're in the online space. Sustainability is the thing that people almost don't want. They want constant skyrocket success. But what we have to do is make sure the success that you build does not define you. Let's just get that very straight. That the house I live in is the house I lived in, that I owned when I was a teacher, the person I'm with is the person I was with when I was teaching. And I had a normal salary. I go on the same holidays. I went on back then. I don't now suddenly roll around in a limo with a driver, having a private jet, which is great. And I'm not kudos turned on. It has that, but. The life that I'm building is built around me being able to be at home with my dog, like pay for a personal trainer, be able to go and love the holidays, but then come home to my life. So if sustainability isn't sexy because a lot of the time online is not sold to be success is sold to be this. grandeur and this next level life. But if you're building a life that you absolutely love and you're like, do you know what? I'm so proud of myself? I'm so proud of myself. I've paid off my credit cards. I paid to my mum and dad to go on a holiday. I've retired my best friend. I've developed a charity, whatever it is, that's the stuff that really matters. And sustainability is what creates that. So just remember that the business that you're building is not to be sexy, it's to be sustainable for your life. And I tell you what, when you get to 45, when you get to 50 and you can take your foot off the gas, that sexy, that is sexy, but that's not going to be on social media. Is it when you turn around and you've worked for 20 years, slow and steady sustainability, and then you decided that you bought five houses and you've got property portfolio and you don't have to work anymore. That's sexy saying you've had a hundred K launches and then you're just, you don't know what you're doing with it. And that money almost disappears and we don't have financial literacy. The success sounds sexy, but it's not sustainable. So I've gotten off on a tangent there, but they would be my things. Diane: no, I think that's such a good point in that very often when you see that person who. Has the like, Oh, I just did all the bells and whistles launch. Look how much money I made. I raised them like, let me just write their name down. And in two years' time, I'm going to come back and see where they are. Because very often those are the people who burn out and then go, I'm just going to take a month of social media and. Then you don't hear from them for three years and then they come back and they've gone from being this hard core, all the things, marketing business to this peace and light kind of thing, because they have seen the light, they have realized the path that they've built for themselves. I think chasing that without the sustainability is the. Number one recipe for a business you don't enjoy. Sam: Yeah. And it's not fun then, is it like, I always say that, like, if you want to just own a studio apartment in Toronto. Good for you. If you want to own a country home in the middle of New York and you know, whatever. No one's success is yours. You do what you want to do. Like you're the only one that lives your life. If you just want to have no mortgage and you want a business that just turns over 50 K a year, whatever who's to say, that's not successful, you know, sustainability in your business. Is is the life that you then build, not the carrot that you constantly dangle in front of yourself and say, well, when I get here, when I get here, when I get here, so absolutely let's just celebrate that, you know? And that's why, if anyone does follow me on socials, I never talk about the money. I never ever talk about how much I earn my launches, because what I want to be sexy is the impact I have on people and the life that I have, not the number. And I think it's very easy to get attached to the number and detach from the life that you live. So a hundred percent, I agree with that. Let's just let everyone be successful. However they want and start celebrating that and not be defined by this illusion of what success should be, because it's different. Diane: Yeah, trying to measure yourself against somebody else and they have business that isn't the same as you is how you get that rollercoaster feeling and how you have those. Suddenly it's been a month since you've been on social Whoo. So much fire in this, in this interview. But before we finish, I have a couple of questions that I ask everybody. First of all, what is your number one lifestyle boundary for your business? Sam: I would say the thing that I'm probably most proud of now, like the discipline that I've built this year is when I'm watching TV on the sofa with Luke, I won't touch my phone. That's probably my biggest Andree if I'm in the bath every now and then I'll scroll and I might even reply to a few people when I'm in the bath, but when I'm downstairs and I'm watching TV, Vinny's asleep on the footstool. I won't touch my phone. I think that's the one that I'm probably most proudest of this year. Diane: that's impressive I try to delete Instagram every now and then, just because it makes me a way that then when I pick up my phone to go look for it, the app's not there and it just clicks for me. Like, Whoa, you just reached for your phone without even thinking about it was so attached to it. So that is, that's an impressive boundary. Okay. And finally, worst piece of cookie cutter advice that you've ever been given. Sam: I personally have ever been given and I've been given a few to be fair. I think the biggest one that I was given was you need to tone it down a bit, you know, too much, you know, you're too much. And it's going to intimidate people. You're not quite allowing people to find you relatable because you are too intense. That's probably the biggest, and that's not necessarily cookie cutter, but it is in the sense of, they wanted me to be like everyone else and felt like if I did do that, It would have helped me. I think that is the worst, Pete. And I'd say that to anyone, listen, be yourself. If you'd show up however you want. And if people say that to me now, you can't see this, but my hair's up greasy. Haven't watched it for a week. I'm in gym clothes. I've got no makeup on. And I wear my blue book glasses. I show up on Instagram like that. I very rarely have make upon wash, nice hair, nice clothes, because it's not how I live my whole life. So I really want all of you, however, your yes, I use a filter or use the same filter every day more because it makes me tanned. I. I really firmly disagree with anyone feeling that they can't just be who they are, if I went to a party, someone wouldn't tap me on the shoulder and say, you need to go home and change the outfit a bit too bright. And if they did, I'd be like, are you kidding? Like I'm wearing what I want to wear. So yeah, I would say definitely just be who you want to be. If someone ever tells you to show up in a different way or do what everyone else is doing or not do this because it's too much of this or anything like that. Please don't listen, you know, you deserve to enjoy being on your platform and being yourself. And if you don't and you can't be yourself on your platform, you're definitely not going to have fun. And it won't be sustainable. Diane: I think also how jarring for someone. To mute you on social media one way and then potentially work with you. One-on-one imagine if you toned it down. And then somebody came to a one-to-one session, literally like the cartoons where people are like blown back in their seats by like the energy coming at them. Sam: that's such a good point. Yeah. That, and also just because it's worked for someone doesn't mean it worked for you, but something that you do could work for you and it hasn't worked for someone else. So I just, you know, take risks do obviously within reason that will help your business. Diane: I love that this has been such a great conversation. I so appreciate you. Where is the best place for people to find out more about you to connect with you, to carry on chatting to you? Sam: I'd definitely say Instagram is the place I like to just be myself the most of the time. You know, if you do find me on Facebook or YouTube or anything like that, obviously the videos are a little bit more planned out, but Instagram is where you see me all the time, just daily. So I would just go there, just search my name and I'll come up. And usually it's yellow. It's yellow, everywhere. Diane: Yeah, just look for the yellow. I'll make sure to tag everything though, in the show notes. So people can find you super easily. Thank you so much. This has been such a fun interview. Sam: Yeah.